How Emotional Intelligence Can Help with Imposter Syndrome

We've all been there, that icky feeling like we're out of our depth and someone is going to come and take us down a peg or two at any moment. Whether it's at work, playing sport or even at home, there are times we just don't feel good enough.

If you take a look at why you don't feel good enough, you'll generally see it's nothing to do with your actual ability or competence, it's much more to do with what you tell yourself.

When I first started working as an EQ coach, I had a huge case of imposter syndrome. Why would anyone listen to me? What gave me the right to teach others this stuff? Never mind that I have enough life experience to put people twice my age to shame, never mind that I have mastered that art of EQ myself, never mind that my friends all came to me for advice on their emotional intelligence.

In my mind I had a set of criteria that a Coach *should* have and it included a formal qualification in coaching. Which, by my own logic, would mean that someone with no life experience, who had never been though any troubles, difficult times, marriage, kids, entrepreneurship, could study for a few hours per week and be a more valuable coach.

We all tell ourselves these *should*. It's a way for our minds to keep us safe in our comfort zone by convincing us that we aren't good enough to leave yet. That we should stay among the familiar in order to protect ourselves from unwanted criticism or undue effort.

It is a constant battle to balance the messages our mind delivers to us that are designed to keep us safe and the natural human objective to expand and grow.

The imposter is in your mind, it IS your mind, and having high emotional intelligence will allow you to become aware when you are being limited, and override the thought.

With emotional intelligence you are able to gain control over your emotions so next tie you want to do something and get that imposter syndrome feeling, you can bring awareness to how it makes you feel, allow the feelings to pass and then choose your desired reaction - to keep right on doing what makes you feel good!